sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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