haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
A bitchslap is in order.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
