That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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