I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
