I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I'm gonna have a badass scar
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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