He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize