there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
