Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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