This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
