it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize