i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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