Kiss
Puke
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
