how can u be prego again
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
he thought i was a dude.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
