erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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