So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
