dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
