If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize