We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
