I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
So much Jack, so little girl.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
We smell like vodka and hangover
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
