Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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