I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
