thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize