Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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