How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
