i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
