why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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