I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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