What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
