Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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