Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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