i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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