He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize