I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
