I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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