You work out of a Hotel?
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
