NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
