Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Randomize
