Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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