Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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