I just made out with a guy for $7.
Jerry, you need to find god
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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