no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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