his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize