They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
worst night to have a conscience
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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