I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
