Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Holy shit dude........stairs
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
