my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
