The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
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