i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
