it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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