hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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